meladoodle: free food is pretty much the dealmaker if i’m thinking of going to an event
starksexual: i was at the bus stop with my sister the other day and for no apparent reason, she says: ‘dude, there are more dead people in the world than living people’ and the woman standing beside me whispered ‘holy shit’ and i fucking lost it
galaxys4: hello students. welcome to my math class. we will be having a class trip this year, the first ever math field trip in history. it’s to hell. here we are
tempoes: everyone says “just get out and leave everything behind in the event of a house fire” like no fuck that shit im grabbing every electronic i can hold
lighttwoods: still the funniest thing to ever be on the internet
comicbookcore: burn everything you love and burn the ashes
talksoflove: remember that time justin was walking in the street and he saw a peice of trash so he picked it up and he threw it in the trash and he felt relly proud in himself what an idiot
andrewhussiesbosom: amporacronus: andrewhussiesbosom: WAIT OKAY IS IT “EEEiTHER” OR “IIIIIIeITHER” could be either one
hallmonitears: how do some people just say “send me asks” and they actually get asks like there’s gotta be some voodoo magic behind that shit
hungarian: it’d be cool to speak like 20 different languages & keep it a secret from everyone & then during a time of crisis, u could speak some fluent russian to some russian guy holding a gun to your head & all your friends will be like daaamn
Official Dress Code For All Females In Public...
smilingemoticon: all shirts can only have pictures of Michael Jordan in his Space Jam uniform sleeves must be long enough that people are convinced that you are a ghost all pants can only have seven pockets. only seven. no more no less your shoes must have at least one picture of a meme on them always carry a boombox with you blasting out the Jimmy Neutron theme song repeatedly until you...
peregr1ne: my mom is trying to pick a colour for her new wheelchair and me and my dad are telling her to get black and she’s just like “but how will I know if someone is stealing it” and my dad is just like “because you’ll be sitting on the floor” and she slapped him
laughterneverdies: casualfangirling: she-wants-the-doitsu: whendaybreaks: nicolasandthecage: when i erase a word with a pencil where does it go are you okay They turn into those eraser shavings and then you swipe them off your desk and they land on the floor and someone steps on them and they stick on their shoe and eventually the person goes home so right now your word is at...
piratenobeard: andallthatcas: let’s all take a moment to appreciate the fact that this guy has been with us our entire lives from all that to good burger to kenan and kel and now snl he has stayed with us from childhood to adulthood god bless you kenan thompson It seems like he is the only one that hasn’t lost it yet. *knocks on wood*
efferescent: remember when a girl from my school wore a dress the same color as the green screen at prom oh yes her date did too
4chanofficial: i find bad jokes funnier than funny jokes